Uncertainty
1st Special Forces Operational Detachment--Delta (or Delta Force) was given official life on November 21, 1977, by order of Headquarters, Department of the Army. Delta Force would be a compact, highly skilled, and versatile unit able to undertake and execute difficult and unusual "special" missions. To select its candidates, Delta deliberately added elements of confusion and uncertainty designed to breakdown self-confidence. The Delta Force candidate would be dropped off in a remote area with directions to proceed cross-country alone and on foot to a distant point on the map, carrying a heavy rucksack. Without a time frame, only "Get there quickly," he was left to work against the clock without knowing what standard he was expected to meet. On arrival, hours later, he was curtly given a new destination. This went on for as long as the selection staff wished. For the candidate, there was no finish line; he kept going until he was told to stop.
They were never given an indication they were doing well; in fact, often they were deliberately led to believe that they were failing, just to make continuing that much more difficult. Many hard men cracked under treatment like this. If the physical demands didn't defeat them, the uncertainty did. Some foundered because they couldn't cope with operating alone in the wild for days on end. Their judgment failed them. Many of those who failed did so because they chose to give up (Information taken from Inside Delta Force, by Eric L. Haney, pp. 1-3 and Guests of the Ayatollah, by Mark Bowden, pp. 112-115).
There is no room in the walk of faith for self-confidence. I've long believed that and often said it, but I'm only now coming to appreciate its truth. I'm not sure if you can do this - maybe the fear is too intrinsic to human nature - but try to evaluate your own ability to handle uncertainty. I'll try to share a bit of my own story, in hopes that it can provide you with some tools and some insight. I have come to realize that I was heavily dependent upon familiarity and certainty. Nearly all of my decisions were made, one way or another, to provide me with the most certain and familiar surroundings. For the sake of establishing a pattern, let's start with me life after high school. I chose the college I attended based on the fact that I already knew several people going there and would have "built-in" friends as soon as I arrived. In my junior year, I had to select a church to serve for a summer-long ministry internship. I chose a church in my home town, partly so that I could live at home and keep myself surrounded by the familiar. After graduation I came to work, full-time for the very same church that hosted my internship. A short time later, I got married to a girl I met at age 12 - the only girl I ever seriously dated or had any real interest in. We rented our first apartment in a place owned by a guy we knew through the church and eventually bought our first house from good friends and about 20 seconds down the road from my parents and the house I grew up in.
Not that any of those decisions were "bad" or wrong - especially the one about the girl I married! - but can you see the undercurrent of familiarity in each move? In the situations that I noted above, it wasn't as though I consciously chose one way or another based on the most comfortable and familiar setting. I prayed and talked to people I trusted. I spent time thinking about each decision. The grip of the familiar was subtle and below the surface. It had a pull on me that I didn't recognize until I finally started leaning against it.
When we read the Gospels, about the calling of the disciples, the whole process is shrouded in uncertainty. It seems that in many cases Jesus said nothing more than, "Follow me," and people quit their jobs, left everything behind and followed him. There was no discussion about "how long," or "where to." Jesus just invited them to come with him.
Here's a question: Is it possible to follow Jesus without ever leaving the comforts of a familiar certainty? I'm not totally ready to answer that question, but my current place of experience and revelation tells me, "no." It's possible to love Jesus and believe in Jesus, but I think if we're serious about following Jesus, we will be pulled away from our comfortable familiarity. To jump back into the Delta Force illustration, the guys who were broken by the uncertainty of the selection process and decided to give up didn't leave the military. They weren't punished for deciding not to continue. They went back to units in the "regular Army" and completed full, productive careers as soldiers.
Maybe it comes down to an issue of fruitfulness. Jesus describes the situation in John 15. If you stay with him, you'll bear fruit. If you bear fruit, the Father will come along and prune you, so that you'll be able to bear more fruit. I think one of the greatest methods of pruning available to the Father is uncertainty.
I'm interested to see your comments and experience along these lines. I'm going to build upon this subject of uncertainty in the SFG Podcast. I hope you'll listen in at www.sfgpodcast.com.
Peace.
SJB
They were never given an indication they were doing well; in fact, often they were deliberately led to believe that they were failing, just to make continuing that much more difficult. Many hard men cracked under treatment like this. If the physical demands didn't defeat them, the uncertainty did. Some foundered because they couldn't cope with operating alone in the wild for days on end. Their judgment failed them. Many of those who failed did so because they chose to give up (Information taken from Inside Delta Force, by Eric L. Haney, pp. 1-3 and Guests of the Ayatollah, by Mark Bowden, pp. 112-115).
There is no room in the walk of faith for self-confidence. I've long believed that and often said it, but I'm only now coming to appreciate its truth. I'm not sure if you can do this - maybe the fear is too intrinsic to human nature - but try to evaluate your own ability to handle uncertainty. I'll try to share a bit of my own story, in hopes that it can provide you with some tools and some insight. I have come to realize that I was heavily dependent upon familiarity and certainty. Nearly all of my decisions were made, one way or another, to provide me with the most certain and familiar surroundings. For the sake of establishing a pattern, let's start with me life after high school. I chose the college I attended based on the fact that I already knew several people going there and would have "built-in" friends as soon as I arrived. In my junior year, I had to select a church to serve for a summer-long ministry internship. I chose a church in my home town, partly so that I could live at home and keep myself surrounded by the familiar. After graduation I came to work, full-time for the very same church that hosted my internship. A short time later, I got married to a girl I met at age 12 - the only girl I ever seriously dated or had any real interest in. We rented our first apartment in a place owned by a guy we knew through the church and eventually bought our first house from good friends and about 20 seconds down the road from my parents and the house I grew up in.
Not that any of those decisions were "bad" or wrong - especially the one about the girl I married! - but can you see the undercurrent of familiarity in each move? In the situations that I noted above, it wasn't as though I consciously chose one way or another based on the most comfortable and familiar setting. I prayed and talked to people I trusted. I spent time thinking about each decision. The grip of the familiar was subtle and below the surface. It had a pull on me that I didn't recognize until I finally started leaning against it.
When we read the Gospels, about the calling of the disciples, the whole process is shrouded in uncertainty. It seems that in many cases Jesus said nothing more than, "Follow me," and people quit their jobs, left everything behind and followed him. There was no discussion about "how long," or "where to." Jesus just invited them to come with him.
Here's a question: Is it possible to follow Jesus without ever leaving the comforts of a familiar certainty? I'm not totally ready to answer that question, but my current place of experience and revelation tells me, "no." It's possible to love Jesus and believe in Jesus, but I think if we're serious about following Jesus, we will be pulled away from our comfortable familiarity. To jump back into the Delta Force illustration, the guys who were broken by the uncertainty of the selection process and decided to give up didn't leave the military. They weren't punished for deciding not to continue. They went back to units in the "regular Army" and completed full, productive careers as soldiers.
Maybe it comes down to an issue of fruitfulness. Jesus describes the situation in John 15. If you stay with him, you'll bear fruit. If you bear fruit, the Father will come along and prune you, so that you'll be able to bear more fruit. I think one of the greatest methods of pruning available to the Father is uncertainty.
I'm interested to see your comments and experience along these lines. I'm going to build upon this subject of uncertainty in the SFG Podcast. I hope you'll listen in at www.sfgpodcast.com.
Peace.
SJB
Scott Bane
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Anyways, this is a subject that you don't hear much talk about at all. I think it's not a very popular subject, but everyone of us deal with it. I honestly think the problem has been that there isn't really much revelation on it. If there is, I don't know of anybody sharing it.
I think the things that are "familiar" to us are things that we can only recognize with our 5 senses. That pretty much removes the realm of the spirit from any sphere of influence. We DO walk in the flesh FAR more than we walk in the spirit.
The perspective that I saw in this is that we think that the "proof" that we are being led of God is that everything in the natural begins to make sense and "line up". God never promised that or said that. Our circumstances do not CONFIRM the promise, they must CONFORM to the promise. If we think of ourselves as sheep, and look at Psalm 23, the only requirement of the sheep is to be sure he knows the shepherds voice and follows Him. The shepherd doesn't sit the sheep down and say, "Ok, today we're going here, then we're going there. This will happen, then that will happen, then we'll go visit so and so"... no, He never says that. He (the shepherd) is the one that is leading us. Our only "requirement" or "objective" is to be sure that we are hearing HIS voice, that we are truly following HIM, and trust Him to lead us where He may. His will is perfect.